(BRANDON HANSEN/Sad, pathetic man who adds up high school stats for fantasy football column)
Shake and bake Chewelah backfield blows up the fantasy points again…
In Chewelah’s 45-0 victory over Springdale, the Cougars sported their biggest point total in years and collected a gazillion yards of offense. What is actually a gazillion yards? It’s a lot. It’s like the distance from Chewelah to the planet Venus or something. This Cougar offense is so effective they move further with 11 guys trying to stop them, than most people move in a week.
Also, I’d like to take time to point out that this Sprindale-Chewelah playing each other is a lot of fun. It’s not a long drive down to Springdale, a lot of the kids know each other or are related. Springdale is a great place to catch a game. We do need a rivalry trophy like an old STIHL chainsaw or deer antlers that the kids can battle over.
Anyways, back to the game: Chewelah quarterback Jake Jeanneret notched 43 fantasy points in the Fisk Magic offense, throwing for 201 yards, a pair of touchdown passes along with 95 rushing yards and three rushing touchdowns. That is a ridiculous amount of offense for a quarterback in the gritty NE 2B league where running the ball in king.
And in the same Shake and Bake backfield, running back Kaden Krouse 37 fantasy points after rushing for 56 yards and collecting 145 reception yards and a touchdown catch. So in the same back field, this Ricky Bobby and Cal Naughton Jr. combo of the 2Bs. Don’t believe me, here is actual footage of Krouse and Jeanneret at the Springdale game last Friday…
Also for the Cougars, Nolan Hansen notched six fantasy points on 63 yards rushing, while Kaden Mackowiak had 3 fantasy points on 32 yards where I swear he was tackling people while running with the football.
Knight has big night against the Rams…
No not the St. Louis… err… Los Angeles Rams but the much improved Riverside Rams. Riverside has been a solid, solid squad this year and one of the first best tests for the Indians in league play.
Colville passed their first test with flying colors and improved to 3-0 in league play. They defeated Riverside 35-0 and quarterback John Knight continued to rack up the points.
Knight scored 20 fantasy points after rushing for 30 yards and two touchdowns while passing for 98 yards and two scores. Talk about efficiency.
Meanwhile, Colville running back Jakob Larson scored 20 fantasy points for his 140 yards on 19 carries and a rushing touchdown. Wide receiver Jake Lindquist notched 14 fantasy points snagging six catches for 89 yards and a touchdown.
This week is the big tamale of a game. The NEA League probably rests on Colville’s home game against Newport this Friday. Both teams are 3-0 in league and look to have the run of the league if they can best one another. Newport has lost a lot from last year so I’m making a completely uneducated guess and picking Colville in this game. Why? Because Colville is super nice and sends in their stats for this column. Also, never bring a logger to a Colville game – he’ll strike up a conversation with the coaches on the sideline since everybody in Colville either works in mills or out in the woods. It’s hard to get things done when everybody is talking about board length feet.
Wellpinit racks up the points against Waterville Mansfield…
Wellpinit continues to put up impressive numbers in the 1Bs and after their 58-38 victory over Waterville-Mansfield, there are plenty of stats to look through.
Quarterback and human highlight machine Gabe Kieffer-Salinas rushed for 175 yards and two touchdowns for 29 fantasy points and then threw 60 yards and two touchdowns for another 10 fantasy points.
That’s 39 points and for Gabe, that’s an average outing for the guy. I’m not sure how many yards he’s going to finish with at year’s end but its going to look like someone’s stats when they Create-A-Player on Madden, boost all the stats to 100 and play an entire franchise season.
Also running back Dominic Abrahamson notched 16 fantasy points, running for 115 yards and a touchdown.
Also KREM has Wellpinit head coach Clark Pauls mic’d up for their homecoming matchup. The best thing about the whole video is Clark is taping up some of his players ankles WHILE coaching the game and talking with fans. The guy is part-trainer/part-coach/part PR man.
Northport’s Malcolm, Rahif and Williams shine in first win of year…
The Mustangs picked up their first win of the year, downing a tough Hunters team 26-14. Northport Wide Receiver Ty Williams finished the game with 22 fantasy points, hauling in three catches for 106 yards and two scores – his long being a 50-yard touchdown pass.
Meanwhile quarterback Tanner Malcolm notched 25 fantasy points by throwing for 140 yards and three touchdowns, while rushing for 85 more yards.
Jahsom Rahif notched 19 fantasy points after rushing for 131 yards and a touchdown. He averaged 7.3 yards per carry, so basically he was nearly an automatic first down when he carried the ball.
The Stevens County Fantasy Football system is easy really: one point for 10 yards rushing or receiving, one point for 25 yards passing. Six points for a touchdown catch or run (including fumbles, kickoffs and interceptions ran back for scores) and four points for a passing TD.